Don't judge my gratitude by muffins

No good deed goes unpunished, as they say - especially if it involves strawberries and whole-wheat flour.

Old whole-wheat flour.

Recently a neighbor helped me, and I wanted to return the favor by doing something ... well, neighborly. And what's more neighborly than a basket of freshly baked muffins?

See, back several years ago when my daughters were younger, I was a renowned muffin maker. I'd make a dozen every couple days and serve them fresh and hot. My friends and my daughters' friends would clamor for more.

I baked my way through muffin cookbooks with ease, turning out treasures such as pumpkin muffins, chocolate angel-food muffins and roasted garlic muffins. It was muffin mania - all muffins, all the time.

But as my daughters grew up and my friends went low-carb, muffins fell out of favor. And if you don't have an enthusiastic crowd, the pleasure in baking a pan of muffins is somewhat lessened. I reluctantly put up my muffin tins and closed my cookbooks.

But the heart of a muffin maker never stops hoping for another chance, and I had a neighbor who needed a "thank-you" batch.

Since this was a spontaneous decision, I decided to go with what I had on hand, starting with some blueberries. Except: When I checked the fridge, the blueberries unaccountably had changed into strawberries. I decided to change the recipe and use strawberries instead of blueberries.

Ah, it's a slippery slope, my friends. A slippery slope.

Because then I realized I didn't have enough all-purpose flour, so I decided instead on whole-wheat flour.

And then I didn't have baking powder so I decided to add more baking soda, which I also didn't have so I had to dip from the opened box in the fridge. It went downhill from there.

No buttermilk? How about yogurt. No lemon zest? That's OK - how about some shriveled limes?

No light brown sugar? No problem - how about dark brown? Oops, no dark brown, either. How about white sugar to make up the difference?

I wasn't optimistic when I'd finished mixing the batter and less so while the muffins were baking - when muffins don't even smell good in the oven, you know you're in trouble.

And I was. They were horrible. Truthfully, I'd never baked anything worse in my life.

My neighbor remains unthanked so far, but I'm going to try again.

After I go to the grocery.

Cathy Wood is a freelance writer living in the Shoals. Reach her at cathylwood.wordpress.com. For more from her, visit TimesDaily.com.