Bernie Delinski

With football season around the corner, I was scrolling through some videos of players in action because I love the sport, and also enjoy reminding myself how remarkably athletic I am not in comparison.

In doing so, I came across one particularly interesting video, which really helped add to how bad I feel about myself. Why? Well, I'll tell you why in two words: Calvin Anderson.

Calvin Anderson is a rookie offensive lineman for the New York Jets. I noticed there recently are a lot of web hits regarding him, so I figured he probably is in the news for some unique reason. And was I ever right.

I clicked on a link and there was Anderson solving a Rubik's Cube.

Oh, but he didn't just solve it. Nope, he solved it while holding it behind his back.

Not to brag or anything, but I, too, have that talent, only with two exceptions:

Exception 1: I can't solve it while holding it behind my back.

Exception 2: I can't solve it at all.

Other than that — and the fact that he's an incredibly talented, popular, intelligent and wealthy professional football player — Calvin and I are pretty much on the same page.

I'll admit that I initially was somewhat puzzled as to how Calvin can solve a Rubik's Cube without so much as looking at it. However, I came across another video which explains how he does it. At that point, I no longer was somewhat puzzled. I was completely puzzled.

And somewhat dizzy.

So help me, at one part of the interview, he compared the theory behind his talent to the theory that some people use for the concept of the movie "The Matrix," which, coincidentally, I also don't understood.

I mean, characters in that movie fly around and jump around and suddenly it goes really slow, then really fast, and someone is wearing a big ol' trench coat that somehow never gets in his way.

Don't get me wrong. I enjoyed the movie. Just don't ask me to explain the film to you, because that description I just gave is my explanation.

Back to this whole Rubik's Cube deal. Perhaps I'm being a little too hard on myself. After all, there actually was a time in my life when I could solve it.

And by solve it, I mean "do a side," and today I don't remember how I even did that.

I can only assume the rest of the formula involves people flying around and jumping around and suddenly it goes really slow, then really fast.

And I can't do any of that. Heck, I don't even own a trench coat.

So, I'll leave Rubik's Cube to the experts like Calvin Anderson, and I'll just stick with that pegboard thing at Cracker Barrel.

Which I also can't solve. or 256-740-5739. Twitter @TD_BDelinski


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